I'm realizing the impact that art and music have on me, once again. I went to a site today looking for a code I needed to put in a page. Instead I cried my eyes out looking at artwork he'd done. It's someone I know in person. And his drawing reminded me of how rollercoaster this summer has been. Its amazing how art can do that.

I remember the time that he drew the picture. And I cried a lot then as well. But it was the music and the lyrics that made me cry, not the circumstances and events. Or, perhaps, the music magnified the circumstances and events.

Is everyone like this? Do they cry not at what happened but at reminders? For some, could it be a soccer game that makes them emote, reminding them of something in their life? Or do they just remember and have their emotions? Do people react at the event or something around it? Can you crack up when a song comes on the radio when all along you were fine? Is this just for sad emotions or for happy as well? I mean, I dance around when I find something happy, I go dull when it is sad. Can art help you through a rough time? Are you then cursed everytime that you relive that art? Or does the art continue to boister you through dealing with the events? If I am hurting and put on Bif Naked and jump around to feel better, am I masking the pain or am I dealing with it? If I put on the murmurs and cry, does that make that healing any better? Or worse, as I hate crying? Does the production of art in whatever form, be it graphic, musical, physical prove to be an outlet, or it is a way to avoid your feelings and dealing with them?

Why am I now hurting when before I was fine? Why do I want to go back to that page and cry and cry and cry? Even though I've been feeling a little blue about it all lately, why is it only seeing that piece of art that makes me able to express my feelings?

And how do I look at that person tonight without crying?

"and now... the end is near.. and so I face the final curtain... My friend, I'll say it clear.. I'll state my case, of which I'm certain... I've lived a life that's full... I've traveled each and ev'ry highway... but more, much more than this... I did it my way."

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