I had such a bad day yesterday. The one part that is really holding over is the thing that made me feel really bad. As it would. And it's out of my control but I feel horrid.

See, I am the lead teacher for this program called 'Techsplorations'. They match up Grade Nine girls with a mentor and a non-traditional occupation. They spend a day with this mentor then present at this day long, night long day. Last year, no grade nines wanted to go, so our grade eights went. Which is fine. This year, those girls were the ones who applied and keeping with the rules that this was for Grade Nine girls, I sent home letters saying they could go and permission forms. I was excited about working with these girls, they were so excited about going.

Yesterday I found out that they can't go.

Yes, these girls who are great, who do so much, who were so excited can't go. Where they went last year, we need to have new girls. The people that fund it and organize it are apparently very strict on this point. Not to the point that they told me before I picked my team, but it's fairly strict. So I had to tell them that they can't go.

I feel like crap.

I'm going to see if there is anyone (female!) in a non-traditional career who wants to mentor these girls. Then I'll run a grade eight group through techsplorations and a grade nine group independently.

This is the kind of thing that makes people hate school and not interested in non-traditional careers. They're shut out because of technicalities. I think if they show a spark and are interested then lets get them going. Who cares if they did it already - they need it. But I have no control. That's perhaps the worst - I had to hurt these girls and I have no control over it all.

Bloody hell.

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